What do I wish for the New Year? Ha not patience, strength or any of that crazy stuff that led us to ask the eternal question of what the hell was I thinking asking for that. I think G*d must chuckle when he hears us ask for these things then hears us say why me??? Cause you asked, silly. So I am done with those things.
So here is my crazy list of things I want in 2011!
I WANT….
To be 100lbs
My boobs to defy gravity
Cupcakes to miraculously show up whenever I have a craving
The teeth I lost to grow back
The stamina I had at 16
To be a dancing queen without broken bones
My house to stay clean for more than 5 minutes
A new car okay I mean used new to me car
A dishwasher I don’t have to trick with resetting and use magic to get to work. BTW magic is not a dependable way to wash dishes just in case you were wondering
My bathtub to drain and not into Ashlin’s room
Wrinkles to be the new ”IN” thing
New linoleum that you clean and it looks clean
Shoes lots and lots of shoes
The Douche to stop being a douche
More Garfunkel and Oates videos
My furnace to work all the time not just sometimes
Wood floors
A magic mirror
My kitchen fully painted and finished
The wisdom of the Grasshopper
A sitting place in my sitting room
The money my husband worked his ass off for but that his boss didn’t feel like paying
People to remember where they came from
Hone my sarcasm skills
My skin to be a little darker
My hips to move like Shakira
No more little presents from the pets
Other people to pick up said little presents
And last but not least I want…..
Kim Kardashian's ASS!!!
Happy New Year!!!
May the coming year bring you all the things you want! ;)
What a fabulous list! I wish for you this year full of the energy this list exudes (and of course the wonder woman style boobs you desire)!
ReplyDeleteHappy 2011!
That list is fabulous! Ok, a few of those things are a little far-fetched (if you EVER get down to 100lbs I will kick your ass!!!!!- way toooooo thin!!!!!) But I like how subtle you were! You make me smile :-)
ReplyDeleteI love love love love your list! It sounds great to me:):) and I believe everyone is achievable;)I was excpecting this list of "common" new years list, but not this one, it was a blast to read!! good luck and keep us posted;)
ReplyDelete